Potty Training!

[wildberry]

Ok so I am really having A hard timetraining my daughter. I have made several attemps, but no results. I had to give up the last time because she started holding it in. She would go all day without peeing. So today is day 2 , and she has only dribbled in the potty once(I amean dribble). She has peeded and pooped in her pantys lots , and doesn't care. I have tryed rewards and treats. I have turned on the taps, gave her books to read. Does anyone have any suggestions that my help me/

[jenn527]

I don't have any suggestions, but I would love to hear some as well.. I have also tried all of the above with no success :(

[sarahnb]

How old is she? What are her communication skills like? I am gearing up to potty train for the third and last time. My oldest was 22 months and was a peice of cake. She went around bare bottom for a week or so and that was pretty much it. Ds was a long time but he was in daycare and wearing pullups. this one I am just waiting til she's ready. She's a stubborn but smart cookie. Have you seen the episode of Bear In the Big Blue House where they potty train? I think I'll look for it.

[twinter]

what worked for my son was food coloring in the toilet,he loved picking a color to pee on,lol.And he was extremely against potty training before I tried this.

[wildberry]

My daugether is will be 3 in May. She is very smart, and communicates very well! I have tryed watching movies, readin potty related books, and we have the elmo goes to the potty doll. She likes them all just doesn't care. LOL

[shadoww]

I have trained alot of children and if a child is not interested it will not work no matter what you do. When they are ready they will let you know, for some children its a power struggle with their parents, and its not many parents that win if the child doesnt want to do it!

If a child is ready they will be trained in a week, 2 weeks maximum. If you have tired longer than that take a break and try again in a month. If it is asking the child and taking them all the time it is the parent that is trained not the child, when they are ready it is usually a very easy process.


My method is to take them every hour, the first week they are rewarded with stickers on a chart. By the second week they are usually going on their own if they are ready. I do not believe in rushing a child either it will make it a long stressful process for both child and parent. The average child is clsoer to 3 nowadays when they are trained as well.

Good luck!

[wildberry]

Thanks Shadoww, and I agree with you. Like I start I have made attemps before, but gave up because Iknew she wasn't ready. I was really hoping this time would work. I am off until the 9th, so I have that extra time to be more focus on her. She is almost 3, and she definilty can contol herself. She know when she has to go because she hides.

[sanstu]

Bladder control is not achieved until a child is 2. Parents have to understand that there is very little in a child's world that they can control. The 2 things they can control become the most worrysome to parents; what they eat and when they "do potty". The potty issue cannot be rushed and varies from child to child. A resistent child that is closer to 2 is probably not ready. I suggest you wait. A resistent child closer to 3 is engaging in a power struggle. I suggest you regroup and make a plan. Put potty training on the back burner for at least a week. Arm yourself with the necessary tools.M&M's for a reward, a bristol board chart, complete with the necessary Kool stickers, stragically posted within eye view of your child as he/she is on the potty, and most of all lots of patience. Explain to your child what each step is about, and commence with taking them every half hour.(if need be) Potty traing must be done in a very positive manner, so always praise, praise praise, your child. And remember the all important PEE PEE in the Potty song. When your child catches on how much fun this potty training can be, you have won half the battle.

Good luck to you and your little one.
BTW, I loved the food coloring idea. For my boys I would throw Fruit Loops in the toilet for them to pee on, They loved this!

[bonste]

Another good reward is for the little one to get a "phone call" from his/her favorite character. Give someone a quick call when s/he is going and get them to call back. We had someone sing the Dora song and spiderman song when D/S was training. He loved getting calls from swiper and spidey!

[Coston07]

My daughter will be 3 on sunday and she does fine when she is home but refuses to leave the house with out the diaper on. So I will take any suggestions that anyone has. I know that you cant force them but she is big for 3 and people are starting to look at me funny when we go out.

[Mandi]

My daughter will be 3 on sunday and she does fine when she is home but refuses to leave the house with out the diaper on. So I will take any suggestions that anyone has. I know that you cant force them but she is big for 3 and people are starting to look at me funny when we go out.

My daughter was trained at home when she was about 2- 2 1/2 and she had a really hard time going in the public washrooms, she refused to actually. I didn't ever find a way around it, it took me MONTHs before she would pee in a public toilet :( best of luck though, and I would love to hear other people's solutions to this, as I have a son and potty training can be so frustrating... (because you know they are smart, and they know what they should do, they just won't.)

[mandi_15]

when i first tried to potty train my son he wouldnt even sit on the potty
i tryed everything lol
i even tryed a tin can and poured water in it so he could hear the noise
so after that didnt work i kept him in pull ups for about 2 more weeks and then all the sudden after i stopped bugging him for a while about it ,he came in the living room and he was like mommy i just pee,
i was like where did u pee? in my potty
i went in the bathroom and he really did
i was so happy and ever since then hes never wore pull ups again
i think it just comes naturally to them ,or when they r comfortable to to go on the potty
he will be 3 in feb and hes been potty trained for about 5 months now
dont worry it will come lol
i thought he would never get it

[sanstu]

My daughter will be 3 on sunday and she does fine when she is home but refuses to leave the house with out the diaper on. So I will take any suggestions that anyone has. I know that you cant force them but she is big for 3 and people are starting to look at me funny when we go out.

Hmm... that is a problem. Why don't you and your little one "pack up" the diapers so they can be delivered to the little babies that don't have any. Then purchase "special" going out of the house panties, Dora, Strawberry Shortcake or whatever would be special to your daughter. Make a huge deal out of the whole thing and remember, praise, praise, praise. Good luck!

[MichelleM]

I find the whole thing frustrating. My daughter was so easy to train. She was 2 and a half and refused to go in the pull-up and took less than a week. My son who will be 2 next week seems to be ready but will not go at our house. He goes in the toilet at my sisters and tells me at home when he is going, wants to be changed right after but will not go in our toilet or potty only at her house. Not sure why but it is driving me crazy.

[Coston07]

Hmm... that is a problem. Why don't you and your little one "pack up" the diapers so the can be delivered to the little babies that don't have any. Then purchase "special" going out of the house panties, Dora, Strawberry Shortcake or whatever would be special to your daughter. Make a huge deal out of the whole thing and remember, praise, praise, praise. Good luck!


That is a good idea but I also have a little guy that will be 2 in feb ( he gets the jist of the whole thing but is not ready yet) so i just cant get rid of the diapers but I will try "special " panties and let her pick some out. Thanks

[heather1]

I remember when I was potty training my daughter, I made up a rewards chart and put it beside the toilet. Everytime she went on the toilet she used to get sticker and at the end of the week she could trade in her stickers for a toy that she liked. Seemed to work for her. I have a 1 year old son now and I am going to try the same trick my brother used while training my nephew when the time comes. He used to put Cherrios in the toilet and told my nephew to try and hit one of the Cherrios. Turned into a little game but it worked. Good Luck...

[sanstu]

My daughter was trained at home when she was about 2- 2 1/2 and she had a really hard time going in the public washrooms, she refused to actually. I didn't ever find a way around it, it took me MONTHs before she would pee in a public toilet :( best of luck though, and I would love to hear other people's solutions to this, as I have a son and potty training can be so frustrating... (because you know they are smart, and they know what they should do, they just won't.)

I am finding the problem you had with your daughter quite amusing(although I'm sure you didn't). My children were the complete opposite, they wanted to use every public washroom in the city. I am a huge
germ-a phobe, so this was a huge issue for me.lol

[wildberry]

Well we had another day of potty training, and althought I thought it was another wasted she surprised me. She hadn't used the wash room all day, but about an hour before bed time she asked for a diaper. I say no of course and put her on the potty, and she peed!!!!!! She did however ask me to leave and go to the kitchen. Maybe she has stage fright! LOl well hopefullly tomorrow goes better!!

[SVTF]

What to do ...

My boy is almost 3 1/2 and well it has been an adventure.

We have tried the sticker board - bought potty books - special underware.

The whole deal : have been postive the whole time.

There was span where he went for a month straight but I believe it was more of a ploy not to go to bed.

And the nothing.

He just is not interested ... going to try the cereal thing ...

[sanstu]

SVTF, I would loose the diapers/pullups. You haven't said if you are using a potty or the toilet. My suggestion would be to use the toilet for training. If your son is too short, then use a small stool. At this age reverse psychology sometimes works very well.(I bet you can't hit the red fruit loop ect) Set the stage once again, chart, stickers, reward, ect. Talk to your son about being a big boy and the advantages a big boy has. Always stay in charge, but be positive in everything you do. Good luck.

[SVTF]

Well we tried the cereal thing last night and was a hit for now.

He is using the toilet when he does go.

He actual just asked to use the potty and put some cereal in ... even though he was sitting ... he pee'd and was excited that he got to pee on some cereal ... LOL

We did the High 5 ...

Keeping fingers crossed that it continues.

[sanstu]

Big HOORAY to your little one!! Keep up the good work SVTF!!!! :biggrin:

[wildberry]

Well we are a week today for potty training, and well it's still training!LOL She is coming along, but still has many accidents. I hope she gets it soon. She just won't tell us when she has to go, she always has to be asked. I don't really know what I can do to make her want to go without me asking her.

[sanstu]

Well we are a week today for potty training, and well it's still training!LOL She is coming along, but still has many accidents. I hope she gets it soon. She just won't tell us when she has to go, she always has to be asked. I don't really know what I can do to make her want to go without me asking her.

Remember, wildberry, you need to stay in "charge" while training. If you take your daughter to the potty every 1/2- 45min. you shouldn't have a problem. Try setting a timer, (if you like) and call it the "potty" timer. It won't take long for your little one to catch on to potty time. Eventually, your daughter will tell you when she needs to go potty, she's young and new to this whole potty thing. She'll get there, it just takes time.

[wildberry]

Well we tryed doing the every hour thing, but she hated it. She would scream and cry she didn't want to sit on the potty if she didn't have to go. So now we just keep asking her " do you need to go potty". Some times we can tell she needs to go because she can't sit still, but she still won't go to the potty unless we ask her. Don't get me wrong she has come a long way she had a poop and 4 pees in the potty yesterday with 1 accident. But you see I go back to school tomorrow, and she goes to the sitter. Not sure how this is going to work.

[sanstu]

Wildberry, your daughter did great yesterday! Using the timer may be a better way for her to accept going potty every hr. as it is not you telling her it is potty time it is the timer!! Speak to your childcare provider and if need be write down instructions you would like her to follow for training your daughter. It is important your provider work with you on this, as it is important for your daughter to have consistancey no matter where she is. Soon potty training will be a distant memory!!

[getoverit]

i have 2 boys..my first was almost 4.5 before he was completely trained (i mean nite time as well) and my second boy was trained by 2.5....here's the kicker...i tried and tried with the first and the doc told me he would go when he was ready and not to force him...i did away with a pull ups and let him go in underwear ( a lot of laundry but it worked) and eventually he trained himself and has never had an accident...i did the same with the second and he too trained himself and has never had a mistake....potty training iw the most fruistrating thing to go through but don't give up...they will clue in eventually...everybody is different

[JulieHebert]

I find the whole thing frustrating. My daughter was so easy to train. She was 2 and a half and refused to go in the pull-up and took less than a week. My son who will be 2 next week seems to be ready but will not go at our house. He goes in the toilet at my sisters and tells me at home when he is going, wants to be changed right after but will not go in our toilet or potty only at her house. Not sure why but it is driving me crazy.



Michelle M
When my son was ready to potty train he was a couple months past 3 (he wasn't ready earlier then that) and once i got him sitting down peeing then i would throw cheerio's on the toilet and get him to aim for them. Never missed them...he thought it was a fun game and it worked ...only took 2 days to train him. Now if only all guys could aim right then all women would be a lot happier...LOL Good luck

[SVTF]

So the adventure continues .. My boy will now be 4 in Sept.

So he will go to the potty when we see the signs that he has to go and we scoop him up and sit him on the toliet.

He just for some reason would rather stand there and do it in the underwear and or diaper then tell us he has to go?

So a few weeks ago we tried the underwear thing all day for 2 days. I think once out of the 8 or 9 accidents he had he told us and it was while he was peeing that he told us.

How do we convience him to tell us before he goes in his underwear that he needs to sit on the toliet?

We have vacation coming up next week and are determined to have him trained before he goes back to the sitter.

[livkat]

If your son is almost 4 and won't use the toilet( he's to old to use the word potty)it's a control thing. There is only 2 things a child can control, what they eat and there bodily functions. Your son is definately feelling the urge to go to the bathroom,and should be going on his own. I would start placing him on the toilet every half hour. Also, if you were using rewards, I would stop. At this stage of the game he is to old, and should know were to use the washroom, he's also old enough to understand about germs and bacteria, maybe talk to him about the germs he could be spreading by not using the toilet. Best of luck!

[Coston07]

What does he do when he leaves the house? my daughter was a little over 3 and she did well at home but refused to leave the house without the diaper. It was clear that she understood so I put my foot down one day and made her get in the car. She freaked out and cried all the way to nannys and then she was fine and we never looked back. Maybe you should just stop buying diapers and let him wet himself until he knows that you are not going to give in. I know it sounds a little cruel, but little people are good at minipulation. Are you sure its not a medical issue? I wish you the best of luck

[Tania]

I say let them be.. They'll do it when they're ready.. I had one trained at 22 months.. and two trianed over the ripe old age of 3... My youngest who turned 3 in March decided SHE was ready.. Put on a pair of panties and BAM a STAR IS BORN.. this was only in Early May.. I noticed for the last two weeks her diaper was never wet in the morning and she'd wake up and RUN to the toilet.. she did her first DIAPERLESS night on Friday and mommy is so proud.. she did it on her own.. I didn't have to fight, argue or worry.. she'd been wearing pullups for over four months.. but in the end it was SHE who decided she was ready.. *sniff*

I think the biggest thing is parents think their child is a carbon copy of all the other children.. I remember hating to hear.. My kid did this and and my kid did this.. and I'm thinking well when is MY kid going to do that?? but I learned.. three babies later that all kids, like adults, are different..

[livkat]

Thats right tania, all children are different . And yes you should until they are ready to start training, ie, when the show interest in the toilet and wearing undies ect.. But buy the time a child is 3 they do have the urge and the can control there bladder somewhat. The whole situation ends up being a control thing with your child, and some things they need to know that they just have to do.

[SVTF]

It's the telling part.

He will use the toliet ... and when he does tell us he says "I have to use the toliet" - keep in mind when he is telling us it when we have just laid him down for the night and he is using it has a ploy to not go to bed.

So when we see the signs and or just put him on the toliet he goes.

Like I said we have vaction coming next week so I am determined to have him trained by the time we get him back to the sitter.

I think as mentiond above I am just going to but some under wear on him and well just let him feel it and hopefully with encourgment and what not we can get him trained by the time we take him back to the siter.

Someone menitoned medical issue above, no its nothing like that at all.

He is just want tell us.

[FutureChief88]

My daughter is 5 and a half.. will be 6 in dec.. and she STILL holds it to the point of wetting her pants. She has had MANY accidents..So dont be surprised of this keeps up for a while.

[sanstu]

So the adventure continues .. My boy will now be 4 in Sept.

So he will go to the potty when we see the signs that he has to go and we scoop him up and sit him on the toliet.

He just for some reason would rather stand there and do it in the underwear and or diaper then tell us he has to go?

So a few weeks ago we tried the underwear thing all day for 2 days. I think once out of the 8 or 9 accidents he had he told us and it was while he was peeing that he told us.

How do we convience him to tell us before he goes in his underwear that he needs to sit on the toliet?

We have vacation coming up next week and are determined to have him trained before he goes back to the sitter.

Your son is at an age where he does have bladder control. You haven't said whether you son has good communication skills. If he does then maybe you have to try a new approach. Ditch the pullups, they are glorified diapers. Try taking him to the toilet every hr. Talk to your child . Use a currency he understands. Pee first, then we go out to play. Pee first, then we watch your favourite show. Equate going to the bathroom as a prelude to doing something wonderful. I think you know where I'm going with this. Do not reward with a treat, reward with praise. If daddy can, get him to help out. Children do not train themselves, they need assistance. Good luck and let us know how you make out.

[Tania]

Reading this I feel blessed that my last one was a breeze to potty train once I left her alone.. My middle child peed AND pooped in her panties till just last summer when she was 5.. I chalked it down to plain laziness.. PERIOD! she'd be doing something and just didn't want to stop long enough or come in the house to use the washroom... After telling her she couldn't go outside anymore because I couldn't trust her to not dirty her pants she stopped cold turkey.. :rofl:

[nbnewfie]

my daughter is l ittle over two and she likes to go in the bathroom by herself and shut the door to do her pee..

[SVTF]

Well tomorrow is day number 7 with only underwear during the day.

We have been consitant with getting him to the bathroom every hour and it has worked, however he is still not telling us that he has to go.

When he does tell us, it has already happened or happens by the time we get to the bathroom.

Any suggestions?

[sanstu]

SVTF, continue what you are doing, as it is working. When you are taking him remind him it is time to pee/poo. After a few weeks you should be able to switch the wording,(on the hour), do you need to go pee, and take him. Eventually you will notice the signs that your son has to pee, I call it the "pee pee dance".lol Children can do this either sitting down or standing up. They jiggle or hold themselves. Tell him he needs to go pee. Send him to the bathroom immediately upon seeing this happen. At this point you're not far off from your son verbalizating his need to use the toilet.
Make sure your childcare provider is absolutely on the same page you're on and follows your instructions on training your son.
congrats to you and your son for a week of hard work!

[magoosmomma]

Not to highjack this thread but I have a question.. My youngest( I have trained 2 before him) is Terrified of the potty.... I have no clue as to why. I tried sitting him on the toilet but he is scared of that as well.. any ideas on what to do? I do not want to sit him on the potty if all he does is scream out of fear(trust me its fear not anger )

Should I try getting another potty that he may feel more comfortable with?

[livkat]

Not to highjack this thread but I have a question.. My youngest( I have trained 2 before him) is Terrified of the potty.... I have no clue as to why. I tried sitting him on the toilet but he is scared of that as well.. any ideas on what to do? I do not want to sit him on the potty if all he does is scream out of fear(trust me its fear not anger )

Should I try getting another potty that he may feel more comfortable with?
How old is your son? Just inquiring as his fear may be because he is not old enough. Also children are very manipulative are you sure its fear?

[Pammy]

I am a sitter and have trained many. I have had sucess with girls over 2 1/2 and boys close to 3. NO PULL UPS. They don't like to be wet so it seems to progress faster just using old fashioned training pants. I also put the potty in front of their favorite tv show and they were rewarded with the tiny cocolate chip cookies when they succeeded. That is the only time they got this treat. Worked for me. Good luck and keep smiling. They all get trained when they are ready.

[livkat]

I am a sitter and have trained many. I have had sucess with girls over 2 1/2 and boys close to 3. NO PULL UPS. They don't like to be wet so it seems to progress faster just using old fashioned training pants. I also put the potty in front of their favorite tv show and they were rewarded with the tiny cocolate chip cookies when they succeeded. That is the only time they got this treat. Worked for me. Good luck and keep smiling. They all get trained when they are ready.

As adults we don't watch tv while going to the bathroom, why would you train your child like that. You could be in for more trouble than you bargain for. Keep them in the bathroom and give them a storyto look at if you must. I agree that rewarding is important though, and lots of praise

[MichelleM]

I am a sitter and have trained many. I have had sucess with girls over 2 1/2 and boys close to 3. NO PULL UPS. They don't like to be wet so it seems to progress faster just using old fashioned training pants. I also put the potty in front of their favorite tv show and they were rewarded with the tiny cocolate chip cookies when they succeeded. That is the only time they got this treat. Worked for me. Good luck and keep smiling. They all get trained when they are ready.
I agree with the no pullups. I bought some for my son the other day and what a waste of money. He just thinks of them as a diaper, as soon as he puts it on he will go in it. He is doing great with just regular big boy underwear. He knows that if he doesn`t go to the potty he will have it run down his leg. So far he is doing great its just hard if we leave the house.He even asked to go first thing this morning and prefers to be in underwear and not the diaper and will go to the potty without having to be reminded.

[magoosmomma]

How old is your son? Just inquiring as his fear may be because he is not old enough. Also children are very manipulative are you sure its fear?

He just turned 3( although he has been "delayed" in several areas since he was born) . I am certain its fear with him and not manipulation. I am not forcing the issue with him but wonder if there is something I could try. I do not think he likes the potty he has now so maybe I will try another kind?? This kid has me stumped..lol

[SVTF]

Fastforward ... middle of 6 weeks now.

Only wearing underwear during the day.

Still not telling us he has to go??

Not sure what to do from here. I know at some point it will just click but after 6 weeks I was hoping that would have happened by now.

Anyone have any other suggestions to help it click with him?

[SVTF]

I am quoting this from another forum :

"Sometimes the bladder is still not fully developed and signals are not being sent to the brain."

I really think that with our son it lays in here somewhere.

[Eastsider]

I want to offer you encouragement. My daughter is over 3 and honestly if you asked me if she would ever have been trained 3 weeks ago, I would have just sighed and said no....lol."
I now have a fully night and day trained "big girl".
Just take your son to the potty first thing in the morning and as much as you can during the day. Keep using the underwear and encourage him. Some kids just are not ready.
Sometimes if a child hears someone they admire talk about going potty, this makes a big difference too.
Just be patient and keep on keeping on. Someday he will surprise you.

[SVTF]

The surprise may have been today.

Oh my .. hope I am not speaking to soon.

The boy as of today started just running to the bathroom and using the toliet. It looks like all the hard work for the last couple of weeks has maybe paid off.

But now that I have said this I suspect I have jinxed it.

[beachnut]

As adults we don't watch tv while going to the bathroom, why would you train your child like that. You could be in for more trouble than you bargain for. Keep them in the bathroom and give them a storyto look at if you must. I agree that rewarding is important though, and lots of praise


we also don't pee on cheerios or get rewards after we pee in the toilet either.

Lots of ppl use favorite tv shows for potty training and have no adverse effects. Sometimes candy and new toys either don't work or are not an option (my son doesn't eat candy so that will not work for us when it's time to try).
Also..my son enjoys books a lot...but they are not a Special Treat enough to a lot of kids in order to get them to use the potty. Some kids won't do potty unless they get something after they do it that they can not have any other time. Lots of kids need lots of different kinds of encouragement.

[SVTF]

So glad to report "Its all good"

Our boy is finally going on his own without asking all of the time.

We have started night training, so far so good. I think we are going to get a break in this dept.

[livkat]

we also don't pee on cheerios or get rewards after we pee in the toilet either.

Lots of ppl use favorite tv shows for potty training and have no adverse effects. Sometimes candy and new toys either don't work or are not an option (my son doesn't eat candy so that will not work for us when it's time to try).
Also..my son enjoys books a lot...but they are not a Special Treat enough to a lot of kids in order to get them to use the potty. Some kids won't do potty unless they get something after they do it that they can not have any other time. Lots of kids need lots of different kinds of encouragement.
I just don't agree with putting a potty in front of a tv. I'm entitled to my opinion and I think it is very unsanitary to teach your child to use the washroom anywhere the potty is placed ie.. livingroom or wherever your tv maybe. Also I've been in child care for many years, and very rarely do I hear of a parent using tv as a reward.